Saturday, June 12, 2010

The wait for when you are not looking

I feel like my rat is refusing to eat his food unless I agree to watch him do it. The entire time. When I look away, he stops and puts the pellet down. When I look at him, nibbles commence. I think maybe he wants me to see all the crumbs he's letting pool in the crotch of my pajama pants.

also, I want to write about this ridiculous dream today. Not for your benefit, because it most certainly won't transfer over well to print. But because I'm selfish and I like to remember cool things like my dreams.

Come to think of it, my sister heard about the dream first hand and she didn't seem too impressed, so maybe it doesn't even transfer well by ear.

Regardless,

An anonymous friend and myself are at some weird hybrid of Hershey Park and Disneyland (actually, I'm guessing about Disneyland, I've never actually been and therefor have no idea what it looks like).

Butall around us it's storming like hell. It's the worst mix of hurricane, thunder/lightening storm, and tornado weather. The sky is completely black and blue with terrible clouds pouring rain and vicious wind. I know all this in detail because somehow my dumb ass friend and I have managed to get ourselves stuck on the roof of a super tall building and there is no way down from it, except this rickety metal staircase that is basically a firescape, clinging exposed to the side of a 20 story building. With 60 mph winds, we are so not going down (are 60 mph winds fast?).

So it's pouring rain upon us and I can tell it's only going to get worse, very soon. We notice a bizarre pavilion-like thing across the roof, it is basically stone pillars with an overhang. We start running in that general direction, but not before I stop us abruptly. Somehow, one part of the roof is completely absent of rain or destruction. Logically, I try to get us to stay there even though there is no apparent cover or reason as to why this patch of roof is safe. Then I look up and notice the 30 ft. tall birch tree looming above like a delicious birch lightening rod. Hell, fucking no thank you. We continue to run towards the pavilion things. Once there, we both pick a separate pillar and cling to it like our lives depend on it, which it does, because soon I start seeing some crazy shit flying in this wind around the top of our building. Not cows, like from the movie Twister, but old people.

Old.

People.

Some in wheelchairs, some with respirators, some in rocking chairs. All flying around calmly toward oblivion. I also vaguely remember seeing scuba divers flying around too, which is when I start thinking "what the fuck...?" but then I see the robots.

These are not the friendly robots, like Rosie. These are like steam-punk Autobots with a Napoleon complex out of Hell. One lands on the roof in front of me, and starts kicking out decorative lights, which is kinda funny. Then about 19 more of these robots arrive, and it stops being funny and starts being terrifying. Because they all have laser cannons for arms. Which are pointed at us. And glowing red..

However, this proves to be an anticlimactic portion of the dream, because instead of blasting us to smithereens, their arm cannons turn out to be like, socket wrenches or some shit. Which they use to dismantle the *stone* pillars my friend and I are crouching behind. Oh, and while they're doing this,

1.the pillars turn out to be freestanding. They are suddenly there for no discernable reason.

and

2. once unattached from the roof, said stone pillars turned in to metal prosthetic legs (?), which the robots fly off with.

There's more to this dream, but it all basically involves a girl who won't let me talk about the ordeal on the roof, also me, looking like April Tuna from the x-tv show Popular, and ruining my red hair just in time for my prom date to show up.

Oh, and while writing that whole load of shit up there, my rat (Paz) cunningly stole all four pieces of rat pellets off my computer desk, sequestered them safely in my crotch pocket, along with some choice crumbs, and then decided to nibble 3...nay 4 holes in my t-shirt.

:(

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